WTF???

Me calling the Emergency Animal Clinic this afternoon:

"Um, yes, hello.  My dog just ate a toad.  He seems to be salivating and foaming a little at the mouth.  Not sure if it's because of the toad he ate or...

The shoes he ate...or...

The computer he ate...or...

The placemat he ate...or...

The hanger he ate...or...

Or the socks he ate..."

"Just give him a little milk to settle his stomach," they said.  "Call us back if he starts seizing."  

At first I wasn't sure if this was him seizing or if he was just bringing out the crazy eyes.  Apparently the dog was just trying to wipe the nasty ass taste of the toad off his face.   Just so you know, the dog was fine. Stomach of freaking steel.  The toad, the shoes, the computer, the placemat, the hanger, the socks...not so lucky.  

Then there was the great news that was announced from the back seat.  "Mommy, I just super glued my fingers to my orange juice."  Yes, you heard that right.  Super glued.  Fingers. To. The. Orange Juice.    

Now everyone is in a time out.

 And Mommy is havin' a drink.  Cheers.